


What Is Love?

by InkgooSupernova



Series: The Winter System [47]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Age Play, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Injury, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Evil Alexander Pierce, HYDRA Trash Party, Hydra (Marvel), Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kid Bucky Barnes, Non-Sexual Age Play, One Shot, Other, Psychological Trauma, Rape/Non-con Elements, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:41:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25898368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkgooSupernova/pseuds/InkgooSupernova
Summary: He whimpered, hissing out a pained breath, as he sat down on the safe-house couch."Hm, kid? You okay?" Agent Rollins asked, barely looking up at him.
Series: The Winter System [47]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693231
Comments: 12
Kudos: 73





	What Is Love?

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place pre-series and features references to rape, blood, and psychological abuse.
> 
> Reader Discretion is Advised.

He whimpered, hissing out a pained breath, as he sat down on the safe-house couch.

"Hm, kid? You okay?" Agent Rollins asked, barely looking up at him.

He didn't mean to flinch at the man's voice. He knew they were all angry at him, and that he was breaking the rules by being out without Daddy nearby. He knew he would get in so much trouble if Daddy found out he was spending time with the Soldier's team.

But the mission was so long, and the weather was so cold, and the nights in the woods reminded him of monsters in stories that he just couldn't remember. They had just arrived at the safe-house after a brief stop back to headquarters after yet _another_ mission before that. It felt never ending, like he would never get a chance to rest.

He bit back against tears that threatened to escape his eyes. He knew crying was a manipulation, and his bottom already hurt so bad from his visit with Daddy that morning.

"Kid, you look constipated, what's wrong?" The Commander asked from the small chair next to the couch. "Need to go potty or something?"

"Not gonna see Daddy..." He whimpered, pulling his knees up to his chest to try and put less pressure on the painful, burning feeling from his torn hole. "Not gonna see him for _f'rever._ "

"Kid, this mission's only for a month," Agent Rollins reminded, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You'll be back with your Daddy before you know it."

The three shared an uneasy, disturbed feeling at the man's words.

He wasn't sure if he wanted to go back to his Daddy.

He whimpered at the thought. How could he be so awful? How could he think of such a terrible thing? All his Daddy ever did was love him and take care of him when no one else would. Whenever Daddy hurt him, it was only because he was being bad. He was whining and being manipulative when he just wanted to sleep in Daddy's bed instead of being good and showing him how much he loved him, so Daddy let him lay down and he showed him how much he loved him with his body instead of his mouth. It was his fault that it hurt so bad. It was his fault when he bled on Daddy's legs, earning him a spanking for being so terrible.

He didn't _mean_ to bleed on Daddy's nice suit pants.

He was so _awful._

"Kid, hey, it's okay, it's okay!" The Commander's panicked voice made him realize he was crying into his knees. He was being manipulative and Daddy was going to punish him again.

That thought did nothing to quell the tears that poured from his eyes.

"Daddy loves me..." He whimpered, sniffling back desperately against the tears in a losing battle. The thought of Daddy's unforgiving hands smacking against his skin, the feeling of his fingers and privates tearing him open until he bled, the memory of his angry, booming voice when he shouted at him, all of this left him feeling like he was drowning.

"Kid..." Agent Rollins mumbled. He sounded like he was about to puke. Great, now he was being manipulative and making people feel sick.

He just couldn't win.

"That isn't love." The Commander huffed. "Pierce doesn't love you, kid. Parents don't fuck their kids. Pierce is a sick, perverted old man who takes his shit out on-"

He didn't mean to punch the Commander in the face. He _really_ didn't.

But he said Daddy didn't love him.

"DADDY _LOVES_ ME!" He shrieked, looming over the man he had knocked to the floor. He could already see a fresh bruise blooming on the man's cheek through his tear blurred eyes. "DADDY LOVES ME B'CUS HE WOUL'N HURT ME IF HE DIDN'T! HE WAN'S ME TO BE _GOOD!_ DADDY HURTS ME 'CUS HE _LOVES ME!_ "

He couldn't help himself as his body collapsed to the floor, curling up on himself as his horrible emotions choked him, a tight fist around his throat that he couldn't pull away.

The Commander sat up, rubbing his newly blackened cheek, while staring at the heap of a brat on the floor. He and Agent Rollins shared a look.

"Daddy loves me," He whimpered out, gasping from the burning pain clawing up his spine. "H-he woul'n hurt me if he _didn't_ love me, right? He-he _ha'sso_ love me, right? H-he jus' wants me to show him tha' I love him back an-an' only punishes me when 'm _bad._ I-it only hurts when 'm _bad._ "

The Commander stared at him like he had seen a ghost, his skin pale as the dead save for the large purple patch just below his eye.

"Jesus fucking christ..." The Commander breathed out, voice barely above a whisper.

"Yeah, yeah Daddy loves you." Agent Rollins swallowed hard before clearing his throat. "Your Daddy loves you, kid."

"A-an' Daddy only hurts me 'cus he loves me, righ'? H-he woul'n _do_ that if he _didn't,_ right?" He tried so hard to suck air down into his lungs. "I-it only hurts when 'm bad, right?"

"Sure, sure kid. It only hurts when you're bad." The Commander mumbled.

"I was bad..." He whimpered out. "I-it hurts 'cus I tried to go to sleep instead of-of showing Daddy how much I love him. Th-then I bleeded on him an-an' I was _bad._ "

"Jesus fucking- he fucked you until you _bled?_ " The Commander sounded so angry.

"Is that why you made that noise when you sat down?" Agent Rollins asked, his voice trying desperately to stay light and non-threatening. "Because you're hurting?"

"Daddy only makes me bleed when 'm _bad._ I-I was _bad._ " He sniffled, trying to wipe away the awful tears that rolled down his cheeks.

He was hurting so bad.

"Kid, that's..." The Commander trailed off as Agent Rollins glared at him.

"It's going to be okay." Agent Rollins mumbled, patting his shoulder. "It'll heal up. Your Daddy loves you, it's going to be okay."

"Yeah, yeah he," The Commander stumbled over his own words. "He just, he loves you a lot, kid."

He didn't mean to scramble into the man's chest, he really didn't. He was tired and hurting and just wanted a hug. He felt warm arms wrap around him, but they brought him no comfort.

He just wanted to be good.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, kudos and comments are always appreciated!
> 
> Also... _Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more._


End file.
